Even I don't always agree with my opinion

 

Hot Dog!

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Posted January 27, 2014 by jim young in Lifestyle

Hot Dog!
– jim young

“If you want to know where the gluten-free stuff is look for the gentleman with a gun in his mouth. Because bullets are gluten-free. Have you tried gluten-free food? IT NEEDS GLUTEN. I don’t know what gluten is – but apparently – it’s delicious! And you need to put that back in there. “– John Pinette

I had a Hot Dog tonight.

At least I thought it was a Hot Dog.

Correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t boiling a wiener, placing it on a bun and adding mustard, by definition make it a Hot Dog?

So how could what I ate tonight more accurately be described as CRAP?

I don’t blame it on the mustard.

I don’t blame it on the bun.

Because mustard on a bun does not a Hot Dog make.

That pretty much leaves the blame on the wiener.

It was a Kirkland (Costco brand) wiener.

An “All Beef” wiener, I might add as if the “All Beef” claim is supposed to somehow magically make it superior.

I don’t even blame the crappy taste on the fact that it was a product of the USA, although I don’t really understand why Costco Canada would not support Canadian Beef Farmers.

But the wiener was also a “No Meat By-Products or Corn Syrup, Gluten-Free” wiener.

When I boil a wiener I want it to enlarge three times its original size like a drowned mouse.

I want to see excess fat floating on top of the water.

THAT, my friends is the indication of a good Hot Dog in the making.

Who the fuck ever told them to take the meat by-products, corn syrup and gluten out of my wiener in the first place?

I place that blame on the Health Nuts.

But here’s a NEWS FLASH Costco.

Health Nuts are not going to eat Hot Dogs regardless of how much you try to hype them as a “healthy alternative”!

Not going to happen.

But you know who IS going to eat a Hot Dog?

ME, your typical over-weight, couch potato.

Except I’m not going to eat Hot Dogs made with YOUR wieners.

Because if something is going to kill me anyway – it better taste fucking good!

And yours – don’t.

– 30 –


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